Office Space is one of my favorite movies of all time. I used to work at an office in a gray cubicle, so I know all about it. Actually, one day, our office held a “smash the copiers” party where they took a bunch of old copy machines outside and let everyone smash them with baseball bats. Good times…
Boy did I hate gray cubicle land though. And the place I worked at was Office Space to a “T.” We were able to find an employee in our building that fit the personality for just about every character in that movie. If we had decided to do an Office Space theme for Halloween, people probably would have mistaken our crew for the actual movie crew.
What am I doing now, you ask? Not working in gray cubicle hell, that’s for sure. I work from home now, doing lots of different things. Mostly just trying to stay alive, but my goal is to build up a lucrative residual income, somewhere in the millions-of-dollars-per-year range. And when I achieve that goal, there are a few things I’m planning to do. Just about all of them are atypical for someone with millions of dollars. Such as…
1. I will live in a normal-sized house. I will not buy a mansion. I plan to keep my family small – 2 or 3 kids, max. Why the hell would I want to live in a mansion with a couple of toddlers running around? They’re liable to get lost in a house that big. Not only that, there’s a lot more territory for them to destroy. I can see it now. Poop smeared on the walls over the drawing they just finished with the crayons I tried to hide from them the day before. They’re smiling at me with guilty eyes while our dog eats play dough off the stained carpet. Gross.
Seriously though, millionaires waste so much money on shit they don’t need. Pimping out cribs that are way too big for any normal-sized person to live in. The most pimping I’ll do is installing a concrete kitchen island that my husband will appreciate being able to cook for me on. (By the way, that link was a shout-out to my buddy Adam. He owns his own concrete biz and is awesome at what he does, so if you need a concrete countertop contractor, give him a call and tell him I sent you!)
2. I will travel the world. I’ve only been outside the U.S. twice. Sad, isn’t it? I want to spend at least a month in Europe. Fiji, Tahiti and Hawaii are also on my bucket list (though not necessarily in that order.) I’d also like to go to the Maldives and St. Lucia if time permits. And if I’m making millions, it will.
3. I will start a non-profit organization of some sort. Not sure what it’ll be yet, but I do have a goal to do something beneficial for those less-fortunate, especially homeless people in my city. And I don’t mean some bullshit non-profit that doesn’t really do anything. I want to make an actual difference in the world. Or at least in the city of Charlotte.
4. I will help someone else build their dream. If I succeed at building my own business and build the life of my dreams, the least I can do is help someone else do the same, right? I’m already on a mission to start doing that now, but it’s a little more difficult. People don’t trust you until after you make it. Until then, you don’t have much credibility. So I’m going to focus on me for now, but as soon as I get in a comfortable place where I’m really moving forward, I’ll help someone else do it too.
5. I will pay off my debt and take care of my parents. They did so much for me when I was younger, and I know that if they could, they’d pay off my debts for me. But unfortunately, they aren’t in the greatest financial situation right now, which is another reason why I’m trying to succeed at building my own business. I have lots of debt that I need to pay off, and once I’m stable again, my ‘rents will be taken care of, fo’ sho’.
The best part about becoming a millionaire will be never having to work for someone else again, especially in gray cubicle hell. I was pretty determined to get out of there. The next step is to make sure I never have to go back.
Wish me luck…